I decided to climb the mountain. The top is cloudy, and so
high that no one can see its peak. There is a heavy forest at the base, where
many beings lost themselves. Some died in angriness, madness, passion, and some
became ghosts. The middle part of the
mountain is just volcanic sand and dense rocks. Where an infinite stairway of stones
leads to an endless end.
I started climbing through the dense forest. Where ghosts were
roaming everywhere, they did not know they were ghosts when they came and
talked to me. At the beginning, I wanted to tell them, but I realized that when
I started to talk, they could not see me anymore. Weird phenomenon.
The dense forest was wonderful land. Beautiful waterfalls
and many types of trees and lakes with reflecting-water-sunlight. Many fruits,
animals and trees. But it was so dense and sometimes so dark and so easy to get
lost. Part of me wanted to stay there, eating juicy fruits. The other part
wanted to leave. Deep inside my heart, the mountain’s voice was talking to me.
It was a hard decision, but I finally reached the border.
Looking at miles of dead land, sand and stone ahead of me, I froze. Why should
I go there? That mountain, I do not even know were and if it has an end. There
is nothing and there may be nothing afterwards. But I knew that all those
thoughts were just lies. The mountain’s voice talked to me again. I started
climbing, no looking back.
I stop. I cannot take another step. My backpack is just too
heavy. For climbing this, I need to take only what is necessary. I open it;
there are some minor things I do not need anymore. I eat a fruit. I take this
green transparent glass ball from inside. I have this ball for a while now. I
remember looking to the world through it. It gave me this interesting distortion
of things around me. It was interesting to look through it and see the things in a
different way.
I sit down. I hold it with both hands and put it in front of
my eyes, and in an instant, everything becomes greenish and distorted. I feel
kinda drunk, kinda high. I laugh, it is fun to do this. I do this for a long
time, days pass by. My eyes start to get tired. My head hurts. My body is
telling me it cannot take it anymore, although my mind does not know exactly what
is going on.
It’s hard to let it go. I had good times with this green
glass ball. I am divided between staying here with headache and drunkenness,
both pain and pleasure… or climbing the mountain, as the voice just reminded
me. There is nothing more to be done.
I stand. I lower my hands; I see the world once again how it
is. Like the forest, the ball had many things to offer for me to stay. But I
need to continue climbing, and this ball is too heavy to carry with me. I
open my hands, I let it go. I though it was going to break or stay still at the
same place. But it rolls back to the forest. It-rolls-back to the forest. Maybe
it is happy there, maybe it will become a ghost. Maybe a waterfall. I hope it
becomes something beautiful.
I breathe. I feel everything felt into place. Before closing
the backpack, I grab another juicy fruit. I take a bite, I climb one step, I
take another bite, I climb another step, bite, step, bite, step, bite, step…
